Start the week

I discovered today that the photo i took last friday morning on the Champs Elysées was a test of the christmas lights. They've not yet been officially turned on and the buzz is building as to who will push the button this year - i'm saying that it will be G*D himself : Zinedin Zidane.

There's also been construction work going on outside one of the cinemas for the avant première of the new Besson film which hits the screens on the 13th, "Arthur and the Minimoys" :





Ok, ok .. it's not much to look at just yet - things had advanced by the time i'd left work, but because of the heavies mulling around i didn't think it wise to start clicking.

I'll see how it looks tomorrow morning on the way in.

It's not as impressive, at the moment, as the preparations for the Pirates of the carribean were.

Interesting (or not) to see this van, hanging around, covered with decals for the new DreamWorks / Wallace and Gromit team 3D animation film "Mouse city".



As for my day ... weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellll - it was the calm before the storm.

My boss and Missus-accounts-woman weren't around; so there were no hysterics.

Boy Idiot had taken the day off; no sighing and softshoe shuffling around the coffee machine (he'll find out tomorrow that his current crush is now his ex and soon to be forgotton crush - she's finished her course today)

I had a chat with my little Miss nympho who had a great weekend, apparently. I didn't dare ask her what a wonderful weekend for her entails ; i'm not into pornography with my elevenses, thank you very much ;@)

I even had time to go out for a relaxed two hour lurrrrrnch ... way cool.

But ......

There's always a but....

I got a call from a client asking me to make out a false attestation de présence - a document stating that "yes, this person has finished his training course".

*this is where it gets complicated*

In France, if you want to learn a skill and your company pays for it, your company can ask to be re-imbursed by an organisation called an OPCA ( an organisation that your company pays into every year - like a kitty - to alleviate costs for all kinds of things; notably training).

Once you've finished your training (with me !!) your company can then claim back "X" % of the total cost from the OPCA.

One of the conditions is that the training company (the préstataire) fills out different types of forms - we're in France don't forget. One of the most important of which is the "Attestation de présence".

Once your company / the OPCA has received this form, the OPCA pays "X" funds back to the company.......

So, Mr Man decides today that he doesn't have time to do his training, but wants the OPCA to give him back the dosh anyway.

Saucy git !!

He phoned me and bent my ear - i have this technique of just listening and saying "hmmmmmm ... hmm hmmm .. hmmm ... hmm hmmm" ... until finally i said to him "let's get this straight : you want me to make you out a false attestation de présence .. that you will then submit to your OPCA .. to be paid back for training that you've never benefited from ... do you know the words "fraud fiscal" ?

Shocked silence

"... bahhn c'est pas du tout ça que je vous demande, Monsieur ..."

"Il s'agit de quoi alors ?"

"Bahhhnnn ...... c'est un ... un ... une aide a un client qui ... "

"Nonononon ... je vous coupe toute de suite ... il s'agit, d'un faux et d'usage de faux, sanctionné par la loi pénale. Vous voulez passer combien de temps en prison, Monsieur, pour fraude ? Vos enfants, Monsieur, .. ils ont quelle age maintenant, Monsieur ?!!!"

Autrement dit : "fuck right off"

héhéhéhéhé :D

He then said he'd speak to his 'supérieurs' and hung up.

As i was leaving tonight i had a mail from the head accounts person at HO asking for info about the story - the guy had evidently phoned around.