From the in-box

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it," she replied.

"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on," he explained.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a good explanation."

Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked him out cold.

When he came to, he asked, "What the heck was that for?"

She replied, "Your horse called."

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There were Five country churches in a small TEXAS town:

The Presbyterian Church , the Baptist Church , the Methodist Church , the Catholic Church and the Jewish Synagogue.

Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels .


One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels.

After much prayer and consideration they Determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.


In The BAPTIST CHURCH the squirrels had taken up habitation in the baptistery.

The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistery and drown the squirrels in it.

The squirrels escaped somehow and there were twice as many there the next week


The Methodist Church got together and decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creation.

So, they humanely trapped the Squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town. Three days later, the squirrels were back.


But -- The Catholic CHURCH came up with the best and most effective solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of the church Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.


Not much was heard about the Jewish Synagogue,they took one squirrel and had a short service with him called a Bris (circumcision) and they haven't seen a squirrel on the property since!