Why do people complicate things when life could be soooooo easy

In the U.K, when you rent a flat, you pay a month up front, shake hands then move in the next day ... if you miss a month's rent, the 'boys' come round for a late night/crack of dawn visit and then, ten days later, if the money still isn't forthcoming, you'll have been smartly cuffed and stuffed, dumped out onto the pavement on your arse - end of story

A bit radical, i agree, but the rules are the very essence of simplicity

In France and the french mentality being as it is, the owners send you a form to complete
If any boxes are left unticked : you're duly 'eliminated' from the selection process
If you refuse to pay an illegal caution of 2 to 3 months rent as a deposit : goodbye
If your pay isn't equal to 3 times the rent (a demand which is against the law here) : çiao !
If you don't have a garantor : don't call us, we'll call you

There's so much bullshit for ultimately nothing

I've taken to filling out these forms as an 'ideal' candidate, demanding a personalised visit of the miniscule midden that's up for grabs by the unwashed hoardes

Either, i honor the rendez-vous and tell the owner in a patronising tone, that it's way over-valued and that i'll pay him two thirds of the asking price and strictly no-more (you've got to chance your arm a wee bit)

Or, i'll just not show up out of spite ... especially in the quartiers that really and truly, suck dicks in hell and where the owner is evidently, seriously, taking the piss

It's amazing, by the way, what can be done to official documents with photoshop :@)