Joke of the day
As classy as ever :-/
A man goes with his son to the vets.
Carefully placed in a shoebox, the son reveals to the vet a dead gerbil.
The father is pretty sure he *knows* the gerbil is dead but for the sake of his son...
The vet places the box on the floor, opens the back door and lets in a ginger tom.
The tom walks 'round the box, purring and sniffing at the gerbil and walks out again.
The son looks at the father, the father shrugs.
Then the vet goes out and returns with two labradors which he leads to the box, lets them have a good sniff of the gerbil and then leads away again.
"I'm afraid there's no more we can do," says the vet. "That'll be £300."
"£300! That's absolutely outrageous!" says dad.
"Well, there was the cat scan and the lab tests..."
________________________________________
There was a competition to cross the English Channel doing only the breaststroke.
The three women who entered the race were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breast stroker.
About 40 minutes later, the redhead crawled up on the shore and was declared the second place finisher.
Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and promptly collapsed in front of the worried onlookers.
When the reporters asked why it took her so long to complete the race, she replied,
"I don't want to sound like I'm a sore loser, but I think those two other girls were using their arms..."
________________________________________
A man goes to a shrink and says :
"Doctor, my beautiful, sexy, young wife is unfaithful
to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and
picks up men. In fact, she goes to bed with anybody
who asks her ! I'm going crazy. What do you think I
should do ?"
"Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm
down. Now, tell me, where exactly is Larry's bar ?"
A man goes with his son to the vets.
Carefully placed in a shoebox, the son reveals to the vet a dead gerbil.
The father is pretty sure he *knows* the gerbil is dead but for the sake of his son...
The vet places the box on the floor, opens the back door and lets in a ginger tom.
The tom walks 'round the box, purring and sniffing at the gerbil and walks out again.
The son looks at the father, the father shrugs.
Then the vet goes out and returns with two labradors which he leads to the box, lets them have a good sniff of the gerbil and then leads away again.
"I'm afraid there's no more we can do," says the vet. "That'll be £300."
"£300! That's absolutely outrageous!" says dad.
"Well, there was the cat scan and the lab tests..."
________________________________________
There was a competition to cross the English Channel doing only the breaststroke.
The three women who entered the race were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breast stroker.
About 40 minutes later, the redhead crawled up on the shore and was declared the second place finisher.
Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and promptly collapsed in front of the worried onlookers.
When the reporters asked why it took her so long to complete the race, she replied,
"I don't want to sound like I'm a sore loser, but I think those two other girls were using their arms..."
________________________________________
A man goes to a shrink and says :
"Doctor, my beautiful, sexy, young wife is unfaithful
to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and
picks up men. In fact, she goes to bed with anybody
who asks her ! I'm going crazy. What do you think I
should do ?"
"Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm
down. Now, tell me, where exactly is Larry's bar ?"
Libellés : From the in-box
posted by Damiel | 8:34 PM
2 Comments:
Haha. These are great! :) Thanks for the laughs. I look forward to reading more of your blog.
Cheers!
Hey!
Thank ya T.P (may i be so bold as to call you T.P !?!) for taking the time to leave a message
*waves*
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