Children talk about the sea ...

This is a picture of an octopus
It has eight testicles
(Kelly age 6)

Oysters' balls are called pearls
(James age 6)

If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island
If you don't have sea all round you, you are in continent
(Wayne age 7)

I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth
just like Emily Richardson
She's not my friend no more
(Kylie age 6)

A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of it's head
(Billy age 8)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots
and comes back with crabs
(Millie age 6)

When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow
the sailors would whistle to make the wind come
My brother said they would be better off eating beans
(William age 7)

I like mermaids
They are beautiful and I like their shiny tails
How do mermaids get pregnant?
(Helen age 6)

I'm not going to write about the sea.
My baby brother is always screaming and being sick
my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum
and my big sister has just got pregnant
so I can't think what to write.
(Amy age 6)

Some fish are dangerous
Jelly fish can sting
Electric eels can give you a shock
They have to live in caves under the sea
where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers
(Christopher age 7)

My mom has fish nets
but doesn't catch any fish
(Laura age 5)

When you go swimming in the sea
it is very cold
and it makes my willy small
(Kevin age 6)

When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays
we hid in the sand dunes and watched my big sister
doing it with her boy friend
It was fu
(Lauren age 7)

A submarine goes under the water like a fish
but it has lots of seamen inside
(Emma age 5)

When I grow up,
I want to be captain of a big ship,
and have lots of sailors
(Valerie age 6)

Divers have to be safe when they go under the water
Two divers can't go down alone
so they have to go down on each other
(Becky age 8)

On holiday my Mom went water skiing
She fell off when she was going very fast
She says she won't do it again
because water shot up her fanny.
(Julie age 6)