Words of wisdom

Sex is like air
It's not important unless you aren't getting any

Don't be irreplaceable
If you can't be replaced
you can't be promoted

No one is listening
Until you fart

If at first you don't succeed
Skydiving is not for you

If you tell the truth
You don't have to remember anything

Don't worry
It only seems kinky the first time

Generally speaking
You aren't learning much when your lips are moving

Experience
Is something you don't get
Until the split second after you need it

We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on our asses
Things get worse thereafter