Over the bridge of sighs ...

Inevitably, after the all out stresshanigans of last week's 'holiday', i came down with a real humdinger of a cold on saturday

I've always shied away from doctors, dentists (nurses are fine though) and other people who get paid for inflicting unecessary pain on unwell people

One particular scripture has always seen me through difficult times - the one that starts "No pills down thy gullet shall pass..." (Damiel 13:13)

As a general rule, whenever i'm a bit ill, i try to butch things out - a few whiskys and an early night'll make me all right has always been my favorite dicton

These last two days though, i've been getting by on chicken soup and 'strategic lie-downs'

Nevertheless, i woke up this morning with a very groggy head, a sore throat and a wheezy chest

I could've done with an extra day in bed but, y'know how it is, if you've just had a week off and no matter how much you hate your job, it's still a bit of a no-no to call in sick on the first day back

So, as highly unusual as it is, i went in today fully armed, not with a hip flask of moonshine, but with my pockets brimming over with disposable snot rags, bronchodilaters and .... over-the-counter flu pills ...

... over-the-counter flu pills that, to judge by their effect, should only be taken in quarter doses by normal people, or failing that, prescribed to people who're used to taking mandies and dexies or at the very least, horse tranquilizers

There should also be a warning along the lines of "If you really do intend to take this stuff, and cannot get by otherwise, please, please, please, be advised to do so lying down in a darkened room in the privacy of your own home. Do not, under any circomstances, ingest this product whilst at work - people are liable to mistake you for a gibbering, glassy eyed drug fiend and you may find yourself doing or saying things that could be held against you during your end of year assesment"

The moral of the story is
Do not do over the counter flu pills
Just say no kids, don't go there
Go for the homeopathic option
Stay with the whisky, lemon and honey stuff